On Saturday night I participated in one of Portland’s most popular fun runs, the Starlight Run. I love this run because it happens right before the Starlight Parade. Half the city comes out to watch the parade, and are thereby forced to watch you run a 5k. Most of them seem pretty happy about this, and cheer for you and try to make you give them high-fives. I’m pretty sure that it’s exactly like running in the Olympics.
I’m also pretty sure that Portland likes the Starlight Parade more than Halloween. Which is kind of weird, because Halloween has tons of candy, but the Starlight Parade has a a little bit of candy so I guess it makes sense. I draw this conclusion based on the number of people seen wearing costumes at the Starlight Run versus on Halloween. I don’t do costumes when I run (because of laziness, not because I don’t love a good costume), and I was in the minority. One man was dressed up like a giant sperm. The theme was rock stars, so I guess that was fitting.
I haven’t been running a ton, so I decided I should just go all out and see what happened. This was a terrible idea, because I wasted all my energy during the first mile, which was before the run merged with the parade route. By the time I got to the parade route and had one million people watching me, I was huffing and puffing and all kinds of people and sperm costumes were passing me. At the very end my fan club was there to watch and cheer me on/chase me down: