Running and then blogging about it
Bikini Competitions 0

Six Weeks to Competition

By Colleen @colleenalicia · On May 19, 2014

For about the past two weeks, I’ve been feeling pretty crazy. Not eating whatever I want whenever I want is a pretty tough mental challenge for me, especially when it never ends. Ever. My trainer confirmed that 6-7 weeks out from a competition is a very normal time to feel discouraged because you’ve been doing it for so long but still have such a long ways to go. It’s slightly comforting to know that everybody feels crazy at this point, but mostly it makes me want cookies.

It’s also a struggle dealing with the fact that I have become someone who thinks about what they eat and trying to lose fat constantly. This is behavior that I’ve always considered to be unhealthy and a huge buzzkill for everyone else. I try to vocalize all of my thought process to my friends to make sure they’re sufficiently annoyed with me, and also to make sure that other people know what my mental state is and can tell me if I’m actually being unhealthy/an idiot. I know I’m not actually eating unhealthily – this might be the healthiest diet I’ve ever had in terms of clean eating (usually my diet is mostly cookies), I’m more concerned with just having too many negative thoughts and focusing on how far I have to go all the time instead of recognizing my progress. I tend to be a big goal-setter, but I often set new goals before I reach my original goal, and then blow past the first one without acknowledging my accomplishments.

I feel like I’m making this whole process sound like a miserable psychological mind game, when really that’s only part of it. The rest of it involves me being the strongest I’ve ever been, learning how to pose on stage, getting(?) to wear stripper heels, and meeting some really incredible and inspiring people.

These are the ladies I’ve been practicing with (plus coach Yami in the middle), all of whom were in the Oregon Ironman yesterday, other than myself. I didn’t get to go watch them, but Facebook is telling me that they did amazing.

So now that I’ve gotten massive amounts of complaining out of my system, I’m going to focus on all of the fun, positive parts of this experience. Like how Yami has done such a good job of teaching me to pose and also how good I look in stripper heels.

 
Plus, after my dad bought me a weight bench almost 15 years ago, I finally moved it off the back porch of my parent’s house and into my workout area so it’s actually being put to use. Thanks dad!
 
Next time I post, I’ll be sure to start out with all the positive – you can always assume that in my head I’m wishing I was eating cookies, but my next five weeks and six days will be dedicated to focusing on how awesome/strong I am. If all goes well, this will distract me from the cookies until I get to eat real ones instead of just imagining them all the time.
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Colleen

I must confess, I started running at a very early age. Sadly, my runs were unblogumented until around age 23, so you'll have to use your imagination for all the runs I went on before that. Running has always been my go-to sport, but sadly, I spend a good amount of my time with chronic injuries. I have learned to entertain myself athletically with other pursuits such as kettlebell, yoga, and bikini competitions, when I can't run. In addition to my unique talent for working out and then blogging about it, I am an amateur puppy stylist and photographer, television enthusiast, and I'm usually CPR/AED certified, but I would still prefer if you didn't pass out when we're together.

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About Me

I’m Colleen. I started this blog when I was 23 years old and training for my first marathon. I was single, semi-employed, generally directionless in life, and had a lot of free time on my hands. I have a lot less free time now, but I still love to come here and dump my rambling, unedited thoughts after a workout or race once in a while.

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